Of little things

Sometimes all it takes are tiny moments to break the rain clouds up & smear a little sunshine into a really bad day.

So is it weird to be really, really happy that my good friend Brandy is buried a few paces away from my mom's grave? As the funeral caravan drove to the grave site that snappy cold day weeks ago, my heart thumped out of my chest as I drove past mom's grave & realised Brandy would be nestled close by! It actually made me SMILE.

My mood was lifted by this little token of sweetness. I felt lighter as I walked to Brandy's grave to huddle with the rest of the mourners. Brandy's sister saw me & rushed over to me. Her words were quick & to the point. She was trying not to cry & needed to rush back to her mother. "I found this in Brandy's apartment. It's totally you! Brandy would want you to have it." She placed something into my gloved hand & rushed off to stand with her parents.

I slowly open my mitted paw and saw this beautiful pill box. I was speechless. I heard something rattle around inside the box & attempted to open it....with my gloved hands....in a blustery mid-west wind storm. Did I mentioned I had mittens on? I was too excited to remove my gloves (& it was too freak'n cold!) So I struggled with the tiny latch. I went to pop it open, but my gloves proved too clumsy & up, up, UP flipped the little pill box. I saw it in slow motion flip into the air over & over again with me batting at it like a frenzied cat. I stumbled forward chasing after this thing, trying to control it. All the while....I'm laughing hysterically to myself. For all I could see was Brandy clutching her side, grabbing her knee laughing with me. I finally wrestle the box from the invisible wintry winds with a "gotcha YA!"

I looked up after my tango with the crazed pill box to find a very tall man giggling at me. I was glad to ease his mourning...kind of.

Clutching the pill box as if it was a Mexican jumping bean, I removed one glove to pry open the latch. Inside the box was a matching necklace. Removing my other glove, I poised to put on the necklace. Looking up, the tall man nodded to me silently asking me if he could help. But by that time, the necklace was on & it was time to begin the burial.

The tall man noticed my new necklace & was grateful (I'm sure) I was done stumbling around like a drunken fool. He gave me the thumbs up and cocked his head to have me join him. So I squeezed myself next to him with my knees banging against each other from the cold. Soon other people crowed around me. Smiling, we knowingly crushed each other to try to keep warm. There we stood. My cheek against an elbow, a woman's hair blowing in my face, shoulders, legs, backs all touching. Grounding us. Holding down our grief. Teeth clattered so loud that we soon found ourselves stifling our GIGGLES.

The winter wind nor the circumstances did not erase my new found smile. Standing cocooned by the crowd, wind whipped & freezing.... I smiled a toothy inappropriate smile (for a funeral!) as I picture my mother holding Brandy hand as they howl together in laughter.